Somewhere between the layers of sleep, something shifts, stirring me from the depths unwillingly.
I don't even remember how I fell asleep last night, I ended up sleeping on the couch.
My eyes open to find Ashen standing a few feet away, fully dressed and seemingly ready to leave.
He looks like he's about to say something, lips parting slightly, but no words come out.
The memory of what I did last night forces its way back, unwanted and heavy. I hate it. What the hell was I thinking? He's just a kid. I must have lost my mind completely. I know with certainty that I'm not attracted to him, not in the way that would excuse or explain what I did.
It's been so long since I've been that close to anyone, so long that maybe I just needed to feel something, anything.
Twenty-six years, since I was born_ without mating… maybe I was just overcome by that loneliness, by the sheer ache of unmet need. But no matter how I try to justify it, none of that gave me the right to do what I did.
