Daily Meme
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The day before the Sports Festival, my phone rang.
I smiled as I saw the caller's ID. "What's up, dog?"
Silence. Then a deep sigh from the other end. "I already regret this."
I grinned. "Not cause of your features. Just a casual greeting."
"Midoriya, I swear to God-"
"Did you see the last meme I sent?"
Tsuragamae groaned. "I've blocked ninety-nine accounts already. Stop sending me memes."
"Sure."
"Liar."
I chuckled. "What's up? You usually don't call unless something's on fire."
"There is a villain near your area-" he started but I cut off.
"Who starts a conversation like that? Are you a pop-up? Are they hot?"
"They hit a few convenience stores already." He of course ignored me. "Weird Quirk. He records himself robbing places and uploads the videos."
I tapped my chin. "You want me to find him? Didn't think you would send me a job."
"You are a trouble magnet. I am hoping you run into him. Sending you the videos now."
A notification popped up. I clicked it, and the first video started playing. A dude in a long coat and a top hat stood in front of a store, flourishing a hand like he was hosting a show. "Ladies and gentlemen, behold! Gentle Criminal graces your screens!"
Behind the camera, a girl giggled. "Oh, Gentle, they are watching!"
Heroes showed up. The camera shook as it was turned off. Then, a second video. The heroes were sprawled across the ground, groaning. Shelves wobbled like they were made of jelly.
"And so, dear viewers, we depart! Not with money, but with legacy. Remember, crime is not just about gain. It is about making history!" He tipped his hat. "Until next time."
I exhaled through my nose. "Alright, yeah, I see why you called."
Tsuragamae grunted. "Figured."
"Any idea where he is hitting next?"
"Not yet. He is random."
I glanced at the screen. "I will keep an eye out."
"Try not to wreck anything."
"No promises." I hung up.
I thought about the quest System sent this time. NO UNINVITED GUESTS. A subquest suggesting a villain might crash the festival. If there was a problem, I needed to find it before it found us.
I walked into the training room, hands in my pockets, watching as everyone stumbled through another attempt at choreography. Jiro had her arms crossed, probably regretting her entire existence, while Mina was hyping up Kaminari, who had the rhythm of a malfunctioning washing machine. Bakugo was at the back, looking like he was contemplating murder.
"Stop for a second, bastards. New coordination training."
Jiro exhaled through her nose. "Oh, thank God."
"We are playing a guessing game."
People turned. Sero raised a brow. "What kind of game?"
I grinned. "I am glad you asked. I am marking ten convenience stores around the area. Each pair will go to one and get something for another pair. You will guess who is buying for you, but it won't be revealed until later,. At the end of the trip, everyone will have something."
Mina clapped her hands. "Ooooh, like Secret Santa!"
"Secret dumbass," Bakugo muttered.
"Close enough," I said. "Pairs will be random. You get twenty minutes per store. No half-assing it. Pick something we will actually use."
Todoroki tilted his head slightly. "What happens if we guess wrong?"
"Nothing. You will just look stupid."
"Oh, perfect, Kaminari is already halfway there," Jiro muttered.
Kaminari pointed at her. "I hope I get you. I am buying you something stupid out of spite."
"As if you weren't gonna do that anyway."
Yaoyorozu sighed, probably debating how her life ended up like this. "Are we at least allowed to discuss strategy?"
"Sure. But no cheating. If I catch you snooping or asking around, I am sending you and Mineta to do a solo scavenger hunt with no budget."
Mineta perked up. "That doesn't sound so…"
"Shut it."
He shut up immediately.
I pulled out a notepad and started writing. "Alright. Pairs are..."
I finished the list and looked up. "Ready?"
The general reaction was expected. Some people were already trying to strategize, while others were still processing the point of all this.
"Great," I said. "Now get the hell out."
I grabbed Uraraka by the wrist, dragging her forward before anyone could start arguing about their partners. She stumbled a little, then caught up, looking up at me.
A few people grumbled, but most were already heading toward the door. No one wanted to be stuck doing this longer than necessary. I stopped at the exit, flipping my phone around to show the screen.
"Oh, also, side quest," I said. "Look at this picture. If you see this man, call my name in your mind, and I will hear you."
A few heads turned back. Some groaned.
"Why is there always a side quest?" Kaminari asked.
"Because life is suffering." I pocketed my phone. "Alright, let's go."
We reached the main gates. Uraraka glanced at me. "So, what is the plan?"
I checked my phone. "We hit a few stores. See if anyone is acting weird. Worst case, I grab some snacks."
"Right, because food is the priority here."
"I multitask."
We stepped onto the street, blending into the usual city crowd. It was busy, but nothing out of the ordinary. No sudden explosions, no screaming civilians. Just another day.
I glanced at Uraraka. "You ever dealt with a media obsessed villain before?"
She thought about it. "Nope."
"Me neither. This should be interesting."
She hummed. "So, what is his deal? He just… makes videos?"
I scrolled through the files Tsuragamae sent me. "Yeah. He records himself robbing places, posts them online, but never actually steals anything. Just beats up heroes, makes speeches, and leaves."
She raised a brow. "What is the point?"
"He wants people to remember his name."
"That is kind of pathetic."
I snorted. "Yeah."
We reached the first store, a small corner shop. I stepped in first, scanning the aisles. The cashier looked bored, scrolling through his phone. A couple of customers milled about, grabbing snacks and drinks. Nothing off.
Uraraka nudged me. "See anything?"
"Nope." I grabbed a drink anyway. "Next one."
We bounced between stores, checking each one for anything weird. Nothing. Just normal people going about their day. I kept an eye on my phone, watching for updates. Still nothing.
Uraraka stretched. "Maybe he is done for the day?"
"Maybe."
We entered the store. Same shit.
"Who are we buying shit for?"
Uraraka checked the pairings. "Jiro and Iida."
I nodded. "Let's buy and return."
We split up, scanning the shelves. The store was mostly empty. Music played from a cheap speaker in the corner, some old pop song, barely audible over the AC. I grabbed a drink out of habit, then started looking for something Jiro wouldn't immediately throw in the trash.
"She is picky as hell," Uraraka muttered, glancing over the snacks.
"Yeah, but you get her something too basic, she is just gonna roll her eyes at you."
She frowned at a box of chocolate. "This is harder than it should be."
I hummed. "Iida is easy, but Jiro… should I just buy her a guitar? Nah, she would probably eat me alive with how important choosing a guitar is."
Uraraka snorted. "Yeah, she would kill you."
I scanned the shelves, picking up a bag of spicy chips for Iida. He liked snacks, but nothing too sweet. "Iida is set. You find something for Jiro yet?"
Uraraka frowned at a display of music magazines. "Maybe something like this?"
"Too basic. She probably already has them." I glanced at a keychain rack. One had a tiny bass guitar. "This might work."
She nodded. "Better than me grabbing random stuff."
As I reached for it, a familiar voice popped into my head. Mina.
"Ryuu, we saw the guy. Toru and I are trailing him."
I exhaled through my nose. "Location?"
"Near the station. He just entered a store."
Uraraka noticed my pause. "Something up?"
I grabbed the keychain, tossed it to her. "Yeah. Let's move."
We paid, stepping out onto the street. I picked up the pace, weaving through the crowd. Uraraka didn't ask questions, just followed.
"You two still trailing?"
"Yeah. He is just browsing. Kinda weird."
I answered, "Keep your distance." Then sent a message to the rest of the class, "Converge at Kiyose Street, Seven Mart." *
I pulled my phone and called Tsuragamae. "We found your guy. Send your pigs. Sorry, I mean send cops."
There was a pause. Then a sigh. "…I am ignoring that. Units are en route. Do not engage until-"
I hung up.
Uraraka shot me a look. "You really gonna keep pissing off the cops?"
"It is tradition."
We picked up the pace. The others would get there fast. If they weren't already moving, they would be soon. None of them were gonna let a villain run around on festival week.
By the time we got to Seven Mart, Hagakure and Mina were already there, keeping to the side. The glass doors slid open as a customer walked out, oblivious.
Hagakure whispered, "He is inside. Just looking around right now."
Through the window, a man in a long coat and a top hat strolled between aisles, hands clasped behind his back. If I didn't already know he was a villain, I would have thought he was just some weird rich dude wasting time.
"The girl?" I asked.
Mina nodded toward a corner. A girl crouched low with a small camera, whispering to herself.
"Plan?" Uraraka asked.
More footsteps approached. Iida, Todoroki, and Shoji arrived, the rest of the class trickling in behind them.
"We secure civilians first," I said. "Block exits. Once we move in, no one gets in or out. Yaoyao, take Ojiro and get the customers out quietly. Todoroki, be ready to wall off any escape routes."
Yaoyorozu nodded immediately, already moving. Ojiro followed without a word, slipping inside with casual steps.
"Shoji, high vantage. Get eyes on everything inside," I continued. "If he tries to pull something, we hit first."
Shoji scaled a lamppost without hesitation, extra arms unfolding to give him a full view through the windows.
"Sero, Kaminari, you two are on exterior lockdown. If he gets past us, stop him."
Kaminari cracked his knuckles. "Stun him or just stop?"
"You are not frying civilians," I said.
"Haha, right," he muttered, glancing at Sero, who already was ready.
"Bakugo, you back up Shoji. If something is off, you hit together."
Bakugo scoffed but didn't argue.
"Uraraka, Mina, Tsuyu... you are on crowd control outside. Keep people from getting too close."
"On it," Uraraka said, already walking toward the gathering bystanders.
Todoroki gave a small nod, stepping forward. "Do we engage immediately?"
"Not yet," I said. "Wait until Yaoyorozu and Ojiro finish extraction."
--
Merlin looked into the flames, eyes full of dread.
"It is written... in the ruins of Camelot...
that one shall binge 110 chapters...
and fail to vote."
Arthur dropped Excalibur. Guinevere wept.
The Round Table turned square with shame.
"Who is this wretched knave?" the King cried.
Merlin whispered:
"They re called… 'Lurkers.'"
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