For one glorious second, Dove had thought he'd just dreamed up the entire "man crashes through my ceiling" thing.
But then he walked into his living room and saw the gaping hole in the roof.And the furious landlord in the doorway.And Thor — yes, Thor — standing there looking like someone who had zero concept of security deposits.
That's when Dove absolutely lost it.
"Oh god. Oh god. Oh god," Dove muttered, hands up like he could ward off a nightmare.He rushed forward before the landlord could blow a gasket.
"Look, look — it's fine! Totally under control, sir!" Dove squeaked, forcing a smile so fake it might as well have been painted on."I'll pay for the damages. Maybe. Somehow. Probably."
And just as he was about to keep the landlord from seeing any more horrors, Thor calmly reached out with one massive hand…
…and shut the door.Right in the landlord's face.
Dove froze.
"What the —?!"He whipped around as the landlord's muffled shouts faded into the hall.
Thor brushed his hands together like dealing with mortals was an annoying chore."Too loud," he rumbled. "That one can wait."
"WAIT?!" Dove's voice cracked like a teenager.He grabbed his own hair like it might help him hold onto sanity.
"You can't just— that was my landlord! Do you have any idea what you've done?!"
Thor didn't seem particularly worried.Instead, he strolled over to the couch like this was his apartment and plopped down comfortably."You mortals worry too much," he mused.
That was it.
"You keep saying mortals," Dove shot back, hands thrown up in surrender."Look, I don't care what crazy party you escaped from last night. Who the hell even are you?And don't say Thor. That's some Renaissance fair cosplay shit at best."
Thor raised an eyebrow."You still doubt me?"
"Yes, I doubt you," Dove replied flatly. "You sound like someone's drunken uncle who watched too many Marvel movies."
That did it.
Thor slowly rose to his feet again, an amused glint in his eye.Then he raised a single hand.
And the air changed.
A rumble filled the room — low at first, then building like a thunderstorm trapped in a closet.A flash of blue-white light leapt between Thor's fingers, coalescing into a ball of raw electricity that crackled and hissed like an angry beast.
Dove just stared.
And with a lazy flick of his wrist, Thor sent a tiny arc of lightning snapping into the floor — a quick, perfect demonstration that left a smoking black mark and the faint scent of ozone.
"Still think I'm a cosplayer?" Thor asked, voice like distant thunder.
And Dove?He was utterly, completely silent.
In his head, though?He was screaming.
Oh.Ohhh.I am so. Absolutely. Fucked.
He took one trembling step backward and then did the only thing that made sense.
He sat his ass down on the couch.Hard.
And stared straight ahead at the wall like maybe it held some answers.
Thor grinned, clearly satisfied with his little demonstration."Good," he said, settling in."Now that we're clear on that, let's talk about this beer stash of yours."
And Dove just kept sitting there — thoughts spinning, soul halfway out of his body —because the only thing louder than his panic was the very real thunder in his living room.