Morning came with the cruel clarity of sunlight. It spilled through the lace curtains, washing the small room in gold, making Ashley squint as she blinked sleep from her eyes. For a second, she forgot everything-the bills, the fever, and even the letter under the pillow. Then her hand brushed the envelope. Reality crashed back as if it had only been waiting outside the door.
She sat up slowly, the paper was now warm from where it had been pressed against her side all night. She didn't need to open it again. She didn't need to. The words had already seared themselves into her memory. A job. A one-way train ticket. Connecticut. Cross Estate.
It felt like something from a fairy tale, or a nightmare. She glanced across the room to where Mikaela slept, her shallow breaths rising and falling under the faded quilt. The same quilt Ashley had tucked around herself as a child when storms made the roof groan and her late father hadn't come home.
Mikaela looked smaller now. Fragile. As if she were shrinking beneath the weight of everything she had tried to carry alone.
Ashley swung her legs out of bed and placed her bare feet against the cold floorboards. She stood, walked quietly to the kitchen, and boiled water for tea. There was barely enough for two cups, but she brewed them both anyway. Her hands moved automatically-lift, pour, and steep. But her mind was chaos. She needed to talk to someone. Someone who would listen, understand her, and wouldn't ask her too many questions. So she pulled on a cardigan, tucked the envelope into her purse, and stepped out into the early morning light.
Mrs. Elliot lived three houses down, she is a retired seamstress who used to mend Ashley's school uniforms and sneak her candy on hard days. Her small home smelled like jasmine and chalk, and the curtains never changed.
"Ash?" the old woman blinked in surprise, when she opened the door. "Well, this is early."
"Sorry, I… I didn't know who else to speak to," Ashley answered.
Mrs. Elliot's face softened instantly. "Come on in, sweetheart."
They sat in the parlor with mismatched teacups between them. Ashley didn't speak for a longtime. She just held the letter in her lap like it might vanish if she lets go of it. Mrs. Elliot was patient with her and waited for her to speak.
Eventually, she said, "I got a job offer."
Mrs. Elliot raised a brow. "That doesn't sound so terrible."
"It's in Connecticut," she continued.
Mrs. Elliot paused for a few seconds and said, "That's far."
"I'd have to leave by tomorrow."
Mrs. Elliot observed another pause. Then, gently, "And your mother?"
"I don't know."
Mrs. Elliot reached over and patted Ashley's hand. "You have done more for her than most children ever would. But you also have to live, my dear. You are allowed."
Ashley bit her lip. "It feels like choosing between her and… freedom."
"No," the woman said softly. "It is choosing between staying in a cage and leaving the door open for both of you." After saying this, she simply watched her with tired but knowing eyes. The kind that had seen storms far fiercer than heartbreak and confusion.
Ashley could feel her gaze even without looking at her. She answered, "No matter how bad things got, mother never left me. Leaving her in search for greener pasture doesn't sound smart, considering that she's sick."
Ashley observed a brief pause and continued, "This will be a good opportunity for myself and mom, but her health is too unstable: her memory slips in and out of reality-some days she forgets where she is, or even who I am."
Ashley's voice trembles, and she presses her palm to her chest as if she was trying to steady her heartbeat, "And if I'm not there to gently remind her, to calm her down when panic sets in, I don't know what she would do. There's no one I trust enough to care for her the way I do-I can't just pack up and leave."
She finished ranting with a sigh, her shoulders slumping under the weight of her own words.
Mrs. Elliot reached for Ashley's hand, saying with a soft smile. "She can stay here while you're gone. I'll make her tea just the way she likes it, she will never be alone. Go chase that breakthrough, Ash. She will be in good hands."
She gave a small smile, her fingers tracing the edge of her sleeve. "It's just… there's so much going on here. I mean, I would love to, but things are complicated. My mom, her condition-it's not the right time."
Mrs. Elliot silently reached for her cup of tea, took a slow sip and set it down with a soft clink. The silence stretched like an invisible string between them. Finally, in a voice so calm it cut deeper than any shout, she asked,
"Child, if you keep walking in circles, how will you ever find a door?"
Ashley blinked. "What?" she asked, caught off guard.
Mrs. Elliot leaned forward, her eyes narrowing slightly. "You came to me for answers, but all I hear is noise. You speak of the same wounds over and over again-if you keep walking in circles, how will you ever find a door?"
For a moment, the room stilled. Even the wind outside seemed to hush. Ashley's mouth parted, then closed again. Her fingers fidgeted with the hem of her sleeve. Her breath hitched.
"I… I don't know." She whispered.
Mrs. Elliot nodded slowly. "Then maybe it's time to stop walking and start looking. Don't let fear dress itself as love."
Five minutes later, Mrs. Elliot opens her arms and Ashley, overwhelmed, steps into the hug. They don't speak-just hold each other quietly, the warmth saying what words can't.
Later that afternoon, Ashley returned home to find her mother awake, propped up against a pillow and trying to knit with trembling fingers.
"You shouldn't be out of bed," Ashley scolded gently, taking the needles from her.
"I'm not dying, Ash," Mikaela said with a smile that didn't quite meet her eyes. "At least not today."
Ashley helped her sip some water, then hesitated before sitting on the edge of the bed.
"Mum…"
Her mother turned to look at her.
"I… got an offer. For a job. A live-in position. In Connecticut."
There was silence for roughly 20 seconds. Then, quietly, "Will you go?"
"I don't know. It's so sudden. And I'm scared. What if you need me?"
Mikaela took her hand, frail fingers wrapping around hers. "Ash, You know what I'm most afraid of?"
Ashley blinked rapidly like she was trying to fight back tears, "What ma?"
Mikaela answered, "That you'll spend your whole life trying to save me and forget that you deserve to be saved too."
Tears burned behind Ashley's eyes.
"I can't afford your medication next week."
Mikaela's smile broke, just a little. "Then go."
Ashley swallowed, "It's not that simple."
"But maybe it is," she whispered. "Maybe it always was."
That night, Ashley packed her bag with hands that shook. Not because she was leaving-but because for the first time in years, she was choosing herself.
She tucked her mother's favorite scarf into the side pocket. Left sticky notes around the kitchen-take with food," "don't forget your pills," "I love you."
Her neighbor would check in. She had prepaid the electricity for two weeks. It wasn't enough, but it was something. She stood in the doorway to her mother's room, watching her sleep. Her face was peaceful in the moonlight. Her breathing, steady.
Ashley didn't wake her. She couldn't. Instead, she whispered, "I'm walking through the door now, mom." She left the envelope on the kitchen counter with a note.
"Tell whoever ask-I had to chase the light."
Outside, the world was quiet. Even the stars seemed to hold their breath. She walked to the station with the envelope clutched to her chest. She walked past the streetlights she took on her way from work every day. Past the corner store where she usually bought candy from. Past the memories that had built her, shaped her, and now begged her not to let go.
The platform was empty. The train wasn't due until morning. Ashley sat on the bench anyway, staring out at the tracks.
Could she really do this?
What if it was a trick? A lie? What if she was walking into something far worse than anything she was leaving behind?
She took a shaky breath and opened her phone. One message from her mom.
"Be bold, my girl. The world isn't as cruel as we thought.
Sometimes, it surprises you. I'm sure yours will be for good."
Her thumb hovered over the reply button. But instead, she closed the screen. The train would come in six hours. And for the first time in her life… Ashley didn't know if she was brave-or just selfish.