"President, here's the budget spreadsheet for the clubs this quarter you asked me to handle. I've finished it."
Entering the student council office, Takamine placed a USB stick on Shirogane Miyuki's desk.
"Oh, thanks… That was fast. I thought I'd have to wait until tomorrow."
"I used the computer lab after class and quickly handled it. No need to delay such simple tasks."
"That's good."
Shirogane gave Takamine a complicated look.
"By the way… Takamine, right after leaving the student council office at lunch today, you caused quite a stir."
"It's nothing much. Just broke a window and arrested two students violating school rules."
"You're on the discipline committee now?"
"Yes. I noticed the school's declining discipline and decided to step up and set things right."
"And your method of correction is… destroying school property?"
"Sometimes sacrifices are necessary."
"You just joined the student council and now you're in the discipline committee too?"
"There's no rule saying I can't be in both, right?"
"Technically, no… But why join the discipline committee? You that bothered by Shuchiin's atmosphere?"
"The school's fine. Just too many couples."
"So you're saying…?"
"That these students who keep dating instead of studying should break up."
"That's way too extreme!"
Shirogane stood up in shock.
"What do other people's relationships have to do with you!?"
"I think it's necessary to explain the dangers of early romance to you."
Takamine's tone brooked no argument.
"Early dating leads to immature couples messing around, eventually sleeping together. The girl gets pregnant, neither takes responsibility, societal pressure ruins their families, the kid gets raised by relatives, and those brats get expelled and mooch off their parents forever."
"That's way too extreme!"
"Fine, alternate scenario: girl gets pregnant, guy wants an abortion but can't ask his family for money, turns to crime, and the social pressure ruins another young life."
"...What am I supposed to say to that?"
"These things aren't uncommon in Japan, right?"
"Aren't you an international student? How do you know all this?"
"Because my old man went to high school in Japan. Before I came here, he warned me: Japanese students fool around a lot—unlike him, who never even thought of dating in high school."
"Where do I even begin to criticize that?"
"Anyway, for the sake of Shuchiin Academy's students, we need to reduce the number of couples ASAP. The stench of romance spreads quickly."
"How much do you want to reduce it by?"
"Zero."
"Annihilation!?"
"The rules are clear. As a member of the discipline committee, I must enforce them impartially."
Seeing that Takamine had made up his mind, Shirogane sighed, got up, and looked him in the eye.
"Be honest."
"If I can't be in a relationship, then no one else should be happy either."
"That's so dark! Takamine, your worldview is way too dark!"
"This is already the tame version. I even had a plan to send all those smug capitalist heirs, including Shinomiya Kaguya, off to be re-educated in Lubyanka."
"..."
Shirogane didn't even know how to respond to this international student anymore.
It felt like the student council had just recruited something monstrous.
"Um… Takamine," Shirogane tried to calm himself, "have you ever thought of… dating someone yourself?"
"Can't believe a student council president is encouraging breaking school rules."
"It's not that serious! The school only bans impure relationships, not romance in general! Don't think I haven't read the rulebook!"
"Like students are really going to keep things pure. In the end, they're just lusting after each other's bodies."
"...As much as I want to refute that…"
Shirogane's mind drifted to some less-than-pure thoughts involving him and Shinomiya Kaguya.
Not wanting to linger on the topic, he returned to the original question.
"Takamine, you seriously have no interest in dating?"
"I did once. But after getting rejected, I gave up. Rejection messes with your head. Even if my mental fortitude is better now, the emotional recovery is a waste of my limited lifespan."
Completely immune to persuasion—that was Takamine Rinji.
"Even though Fujiwara's words hurt me deeply, in hindsight, her analysis made sense. Maybe I really will never have a girlfriend in my lifetime."
"That's… just too depressing."
"I'm not like you, President. You've got good grades and popularity. You even became student council president through an election despite entering from outside. Of course you don't need to worry about whether you'll have a girlfriend."
"Cough… I suppose that's one of my strong points."
Rinji Takamine's praise was clearly very pleasing to Miyuki Shirogane.
"Yes, except for young ladies like the one from the Shinomiya family who have impossibly high standards, most others… Wait, President, what's wrong? You look kind of down all of a sudden."
"It's… it's nothing."
"Well, that's all I'll say. I've got to keep working as a member of the Public Morals Committee. Watching all these couples being lovey-dovey in front of me every day is honestly painful."
"You really are… Oh right, Treasurer Rinji, can I ask you something?" Shirogane suddenly said.
"President, ask away."
"What would you do if a girl confessed to you?"
"That's impossible. I'm not popular with girls. Even when I confess, I get rejected—there's no way a girl would confess to me first. What kind of fantasy is that?"
"I said if."
"If a girl confessed to me, huh… Let me think."
Rinji Takamine gave it some thought, then answered seriously:
"Go get a marriage license."
"…That answer is even more insane than I expected."