Sundays were sacred in the Dunphy household. Not in the traditional, spiritual sense—though Claire often prayed Phil wouldn't start a new DIY project—but in the deeply familial, slightly chaotic, almost comforting way that only this particular family could pull off. This Sunday was no exception.
Claire had orchestrated a "casual" family get-together. Which, in Dunphy terms, meant three grocery runs, two seating arrangements, and a color-coded list labeled "Appetizer Strategy." It wasn't a holiday. It wasn't anyone's birthday. It was just... family day. Because, as Claire put it, "If we don't regularly remind ourselves we love each other, we might forget."
By noon, the entire extended clan was en route. And Ethan? Ethan was mentally preparing for war.
Not actual war. Emotional war. The kind where there's too much noise, too many hugs, and someone always ends up crying about a board game.
He stood in front of the mirror, combing his hair exactly seven times. "Two light sprays of cologne," he muttered to himself. "Any more and I'll smell like Uncle Mitch at his college reunion."
Phil popped his head in with a grin. "Looking sharp, E-man. Ready to show off those mad people skills?"
Ethan arched an eyebrow. "People skills or survival skills?"
"Same thing!" Phil replied, far too cheerily.
Downstairs, the kitchen was already a buzz of tension. Claire was double-checking the hummus presentation, muttering about symmetrical carrot stick placement.
"Mom, it's dip, not a centerpiece," Ethan pointed out gently.
"It's both," Claire said without turning around. "If you've ever been to a PTA potluck, you'd know the stakes."
Before Ethan could offer his usual sarcastic commentary, the doorbell rang. "Brace for impact," he whispered, and Luke—already wearing a colander on his head—shouted, "I GOT IT!"
"Please don't yell that every time someone rings the bell," Claire called after him. "You're not a game show host."
Moments later, Jay and Gloria entered the house, Gloria's voice trailing ahead of her like a musical trumpet. "¡Hola, familia! We brought arepas and a flan, and Jay brought his beautiful, smiling personality!"
"I brought wine," Jay grunted, handing it off without ceremony.
Ethan brightened slightly. "Hey, Gloria."
Gloria gave him a big hug and kissed both his cheeks. "Mi amor, you always smell like music and books. How are you?"
"I... guess I'm okay?" he said, overwhelmed but charmed.
Jay clapped him lightly on the shoulder. "Still quiet as ever, huh?"
Ethan half-smiled. "Working on it."
A few minutes later, Cam and Mitch arrived with a tray of suspiciously perfect-looking quiches.
"I call them 'Quiche Me Softly,'" Cam said proudly. "And yes, I've workshopped that name."
"Repeatedly," Mitch muttered under his breath.
Ethans family filtered in next—Haley, in heels too high for a casual afternoon; Alex, reading a book even while walking; and Luke, now wearing safety goggles and holding a clipboard. "I'm documenting the party. For... science."
"No lasers," Ethan warned.
"I make no promises," Luke replied ominously.
Ethan scanned the room, quietly taking mental notes on the different dynamics unfolding. Gloria and Claire were in the kitchen, laughing but also clearly trying to outdo each other in appetizer aesthetic. Jay was inspecting the patio furniture, nodding approvingly. Cam and Mitch were setting up their quiche station with enough flair to rival a wedding buffet. Phil was—naturally—organizing a mini magic show for the younger cousins.
And then there was Alex.
Ethan found her sitting on the armrest of the couch, half-involved in the chaos but clearly half-removed. Her book—something scientific, no doubt—was open on her lap, but she wasn't reading. Just... observing.
He slid into the spot beside her.
"Hey."
She glanced at him, giving a rare, appreciative smile. "Hey."
"What's your current hypothesis?"
"That this family contains at least three dominant alpha personalities and one borderline megalomaniac," she said dryly.
"Only one?"
Alex shrugged. "I'm being generous."
There was a beat of silence.
"You doing okay?" Ethan asked, his voice lower now, more sincere.
Alex blinked, caught off guard. "Yeah. I mean, I guess. Sometimes it just feels like... everyone forgets I'm here unless I'm correcting them."
"I never forget," Ethan said simply.
Alex looked at him, and this time the smile wasn't rare—it was real. "Thanks."
They didn't say anything for a while, just watched the family in motion.
And then Luke set off a small glitter cannon.
"Science!" he screamed.
Claire yelled. Gloria laughed. Haley checked if it got on her shoes. Cam screamed. Mitch tried to act like he wasn't related. Jay said, "Well, that'll be on the carpet forever." And Phil? Phil cheered like it was a halftime show.
Ethan and Alex exchanged a look.
"Borderline megalomaniac," she said again.
Ethan nodded. "Confirmed."
By late afternoon, food had been demolished, the living room resembled a set from a documentary on emotional chaos, and Haley was trying to teach Gloria how to use a filter app.
Ethan drifted outside to sit with Manny, who was staring at the clouds like they owed him money.
"You okay?"
Manny sighed. "I just realized I'm probably going to peak at 17."
"Better than peaking at 12," Ethan offered. "Which is what Luke is aiming for."
Manny chuckled. "Your voice still sounds like piano keys when you talk. So calm."
Ethan shrugged. "I get that from organizing. And humming."
Manny looked at him, serious. "I hope you know... you're really good at being here. Just being."
Ethan tilted his head. "That supposed to be a compliment?"
"Yes," Manny said, smiling. "An annoying one. Because now I have to rethink my entire theory on how introverts function at parties."
Just then, Claire called everyone inside. "Time for coffee, cake, and compliments! Or passive-aggressive observations disguised as compliments. Either way, gather up!"
Jay groaned. "Why can't we just drink the coffee and skip the feelings?"
"Because, Jay," Gloria said, linking arms with him, "family is like a flan. Soft, sweet, and better when we scoop all the pieces together."
Jay made a face. "That made no sense."
"She's right, though," Ethan said, quietly behind them.
Jay looked over, mildly surprised, then gave a rare approving grunt. "Smart kid."
As the family moved toward the kitchen, Ethan lingered a second, letting the noise swell ahead of him. It was messy, loud, and not at all according to plan.
And he wouldn't have it any other way.