Chapter 51: Confusion
Sakurai Saki opened the apartment door.
He changed his shoes at the entryway.
Then he saw Nakano Nino timidly peeking her head out from the living room; at this moment, she slightly lowered her head, secretly watching Sakurai.
"Welcome back~" Nakano Nino didn't ask why he was coming home so late today.
She was very clear about her own position — just a freeloader, with no home, and no presence left.
If Sakurai Saki told her to leave now, she wouldn't have any way to resist.
"For you." Sakurai Saki took the contact lenses from his bag and handed them to the girl.
Nakano Nino walked up to him but didn't immediately take them.
She roughly guessed what they were, which was why she didn't dare to hold them.
Seeing her not moving, Sakurai thought she was being self-conscious again, so he coldly said:
"I brought you back here because I wasn't cruel enough. Me not caring about you doesn't mean I can just stand by and watch you go die. Likewise, if I buy things for you, you don't need to feel guilty."
"Got it now?" Sakurai placed the contact lenses into the girl's hand.
After that, he headed toward the living room.
He hung his jacket on the standing rack, then set his school bag down in its place.
When he came out of his room, Sakurai saw Nakano Nino still sitting frozen on the sofa.
Sakurai suddenly remembered — it seemed like she hadn't eaten anything.
He turned his head toward the kitchen; the loaves of bread on the table were still untouched.
Same as yesterday, same as today. Was she not planning to eat?
Without thinking much, Sakurai went to the dining table, grabbed a loaf of bread, and tossed it to her in the living room.
Today, he had barely used his powers, so there was no need to hold back on any urges.
'Let's watch a little TV.' Sakurai sat down on the sofa and turned on the TV with the remote.
Today there was a variety show he liked.
...
Nakano Nino held the unsealed contact lenses, hesitating for a long time without daring to put them on.
"..."
Her hands trembled as she picked up one of the lenses.
Then slowly set it back down.
The sound from the TV rang in her ears, lively and noisy. On the screen, the variety show hosts were laughing and joking cheerfully.
Nino turned her head to look at Sakurai and noticed that he, too, was smiling.
Even through her blurry vision, she could tell — right now, he was truly happy.
Sakurai noticed her gaze and said:
"Smiling is really important. Someone once told me, if you can't even manage a smile, then what's the point of living…"
He paused for a few seconds.
"But don't go thinking about suicide either. The people who care about you would be heartbroken."
The people who care about me…?
Besides you, is there anyone else left?
In my world, you're all I have now!
Nakano Nino held the contact lenses without saying anything.
"Put them on." Sakurai spoke up.
"Humans have to look forward."
Though Sakurai didn't know what she had been through, he knew that if people kept drowning in the pain of the past, they'd eventually be swallowed by it.
"Um." Nakano Nino used her fingers to pull up her eyelid, smoothly placing the contact lens onto her eye.
Her vision in her left eye instantly became clear.
She picked up the second one and repeated the same motion.
Blinking a few times, Nino lowered her head.
"Hm? Done putting them on?" Sakurai asked curiously.
"Is the prescription right?"
Nino stiffly nodded.
She timidly turned her head, her gaze pausing at his legs, then moving up to his waist, then his torso…
Her line of sight gradually lifted higher…
...
So it really is him…
Nino let out a smile that looked even worse than when she cried.
Hot tears spilled from the corners of her eyes.
Nino, you already knew, didn't you?
That voice was so familiar — you just didn't want to believe it — like an ordinary person pretending to be deaf.
Nino, you're such an idiot!
"What's wrong?" Sakurai looked slightly surprised; reflexively, he pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and gently wiped the tears from the girl's face.
Why are you being so gentle with me? Why…?
Nino covered her face with her hands, awkwardly wiping away the tears, but the more she wiped, the more they kept flowing.
Her vision began to blur again.
In her mind, scenes of the two of them arguing played over and over.
It was clearly her fault. She was the one who threw his things.
Why did he still bring her back?
Why was he still being so kind to her?
"I'm sorry…"
"I did something unforgivable to you… I'm truly sorry…"
"Please, I beg you, don't kick me out… In my world, you're all I have left…" — Nino choked out, her voice trembling.
Sakurai was stunned, startled by the sudden burst of emotion from the girl. She had only just seen his face, so why had it come to this?
He gently said, "Don't cry anymore…"
Sakurai was starting to feel like he couldn't understand what girls were thinking at all.
"We just met for the first time two days ago, right? In this short time, even if you stay here, I'm not going to throw you out."
When Nino heard those words, she was stunned, frozen in place, only the tears at the corners of her eyes continued to fall.
For a moment, the girl didn't know what expression she should make.
The guilt she felt toward him, combined with the care he had shown her these past days — all of that together made Nino feel like laughing a little.
To nearly die, only to meet the very person she absolutely shouldn't meet… wasn't that just so ridiculous?
But at the same time, she really wanted to cry.
If he regained his memories… how would he treat her?
What should she do then?
He would definitely hate her.
...
So it turned out, this lifeline wasn't a vine at all — it was a thorny branch.
In truth, Nakano Nino had long had a faint feeling. After all… they had met so many times before, even quarreled — how could she possibly not recognize his voice?
Precisely because she had a hunch, she didn't dare look straight at Sakurai's face. She didn't even dare lift her head.
If it were just the body, she could still deceive herself.
But the face… that couldn't be changed.
[Can someone drowning fall in love with a thorny branch?]
To this question, Nakano Nino could give a definite answer: Yes.
"I'm sorry… truly, I'm sorry…" Nakano Nino looked at Sakurai, softly saying:
"Tomorrow I'll leave, so please… don't hate me."
Rather than wait until he regained his memories and drove her away, it would be better… if she left on her own first.
"If — I mean, if — just by chance…"
With her heart filled with fear, yet holding onto a shred of hope, she spoke:
"If we happen to meet again next time… could you smile at me?"
Nakano Nino pleaded, her voice full of self-doubt:
"Just a smile is enough… I wouldn't dare ask for anything more…"
Please don't scold me… please don't…
I'm truly… sorry…
Sakurai didn't understand what she was saying, but he still replied:
"I don't hate you, there's no need to say things like that."
This kid… does she have something wrong in her head? — Sakurai thought silently.
"Mm." Nakano Nino gave him a faint smile.
Then she wiped her tears clean.
…
Time passed.
Late at night.
Nakano Nino lay on the sofa, staring blankly up at the ceiling of the living room, her eyes empty and devoid of light.
Today, when Sakurai left, she had been able to touch objects.
She had even stood by the window and shouted once — and the people on the street had turned their heads to look.
It was just that… her sense of presence was still extremely faint, easily ignored by people without them even realizing.
And through all of this, Nino had come to recognize one truth.
The abnormalities in her body… were about to disappear.
"What… will happen next?"
Carrying this unease, Nakano Nino closed her eyes, slowly drifting off to sleep.