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Kay sooooo.....๐
I took my relationship with Jewel serious after I had a meeting with Daniel ๐ซจ. Yeas, we had mind blowing sex๐ฅต but it felt wrong. And that's like a red flag for me. Feeling bad being with another nigga. So I wanted to make things clear to myself and asked Daniel about his relationship. I didn't know if he was in one and I ha never asked either. He told me he was in one...going to like a year ๐ฑ๐ฑ...I almost slapped the fuck outta him cause he's not the cheating type and neither am I. I had a talk with myself in that moment and I just ended everything with him that day even though it hurt like hell ๐ฅ.
I focused on Jewel from the on.
It's been 2 years and four months with Jewel already and I finally admit to myself that I'm actually falling in love. So I took Jewel serious, just him and no one else. That didn't mean that there weren't guys talking to me though ๐คช. There was one especially 'Praise'. I still don't know how I got to know that mad person ๐. He likes me...and funny enough, I liked him too but it couldn't work cause of Jewel. Butttt....we did have a little fun ๐ and that was it. Being with Jewel was fun I won't lie. He knows me like the back of his hand โ...he knows my quiet ๐ค but angry face, quiet ๐ค but sad face, even quiet ๐ค but horny face. He just knows me too damn well!! And I liked that about him. I honestly wasn't expecting 2 years being together. He was also shocked it took that long cause his last relationship made him rethink everything concerning being in a relationship and he wasn't ready for another one(I know this cause he told me๐). I didn't even mind if he was cheating cause I wasn't faithful either at first cause I wasn't taking him serious cause I was guarding my heart and I wasn't fully healed from the former pain so I'm not about to make it worse for me. But..all that changed the minute I saw Jewel was serious with me. I had a building trust in him so it was peaceful in 2022 for four months ๐.
I found out he was cheating๐...yup..the one person I managed to leave a tiny opening in my heart for actually cheated on me. And worse he cheated when I decided to be faithful!!!๐ค๐ ๐ก. Motherfuc---๐คฌ
So basically, I found out about a girl he has been seeing for God knows how long. She's happens to be the owner of the female items I found in his house ๐ ..you know? The one where he lied his neighbor and bestie were the owners of the clothes? Yeah๐ฎโ๐จ. Funny story actually, I was bored one day and was scrolling through Facebook, I was just admiring his handsomeness as I always do any man I'm dating๐...I saw cute pictures of him, then his bestie for her birthday then...a light skinned semi-pretty girl. It was also her birthday and he posted with literally a love letter ๐ not a fucking caption. And it's not one picture ๐ผ๏ธ, there were more birthday pictures on the same date..(i don't really remember cause why would I remember her birthday??). So, I was thinking ๐ค maybe it's nothing...but something kept telling me to check her profile and I did. Scrolling, scrolling...I stopped when I saw something shocking. There was this necklace with a capital letter 'D' as it's pendant she has on. I zoomed in and noticed Jewel also had that same necklace with the capital letter 'D'. I shrugged it off and continued scrolling, then...I saw a shirt ๐ he owned on her body...I was like..."nah..nah...no way" , and the background of the picture was in his family house, I mean i would know. Continued scrolling and I saw more clothing items he also puts on including bracelets๐คจ!! I knew shit was getting too real, I confirmed my suspicion as I saw a video she made in his house,in his sweater, with my green hat on๐ง. The comments didn't do him any justice as in every post she made, he would comment "My queen" and she would reply "Baby daddy" ๐คฎ. I calmly sent him the screenshots I made with shaking hands, he didn't reply me. He didn't pick my calls ๐ either.
I was more than angry ๐ก...I couldn't believe it. I knew he was shocked as to how I found out cause he didn't reply my messages on Whatsapp for days making me even more angry than I already was. I blocked him everywhere and till wanting him to call somehow ๐. I know he called after a few days cause 'TrueCaller App' would alert me that a blocked number tried to contact me. I unblocked him cause I needed an explanation for his bullshit. I know I wasn't supposed to even listen to what he'd say but I just wanted to...it hurt really bad ๐.
I went to see him after a few weeks of not speaking for him to explain. He has this stupid/cute way of keeping his face when he knows I'm mad as hell and he didn't fail to display it. Only this time, I didn't care about the face, I was really disappointed โน๏ธ. He failed me. So..he told me a lot of crap I couldn't care less to remember and the only one I could remember cause of how stupid it is๐ ....is that he lacked clothing items so she assists him in that area๐. I just weak๐ฎโ๐จ.
I acted like I understood and 'forgave' him. He agreed to stop commenting on her post or posting her. Said he would only post her on her birthday which I wasn't okay with but didn't say anything ๐ค.
Little did I know I was creating something in me that should not exist.๐ I resented him from there. The Love wasn't all that anymore, for me at least. It broke me but I couldn't summon the courage to leave him.
I thought of getting back at him...but what good would that do?? So, I decided not to put all my egg s๐ฅ in one basket ๐งบ. I started talking to the other guys I stopped talking to cause of him . I went back to not taking him serious again..he wouldn't see a sign from me unless I wanted him to see one๐.
I felt some type of way towards him but weirdly though, I still loved himโค๏ธโ๐ฉน. Which was so fucking annoying cause...Why???!๐ซฅ